Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The Mastripolito 5K

So I get this really NIFTY.. NEAT-O... COOL as all get up.. idea for New Year's Eve… and I pitched it to Joe.

"Honey.. what do you think about running at midnight?...we can start running about 10 minutes of and then continue into the new year..doing 3 miles? I mean would that be cool or what!??”

Now this is not a new concept or idea as there are New Year's Eve races.. but alas I couldn’t find any local ones to do.. so this was the perfect idea… the Mastripolito 5K was born!!!

Only problem now is the National Weather Forecast issued a high wind & wind chill warning for our area tonight… they are calling for sustained winds of 30-40 mph with gusts to 55 mph… (um...how hard is it to run INTO 30-40 mph winds?)... and well just because that is not enough they throw in the wind chill warning in which the forecast indicates that temperatures will drop into the teens by evening and will be in the single digits by morning and that anyone with travel plans on New Year’s Eve should take the necessary precautions and please dress appropriately.

So hmm.. I will let you know how it goes..

*****************************
And here are some last minute thoughts to inspire you into the New Year.. my last two official stupid happenings this week..

DON’T EVER.. EVER.. wear feathers to bed..
Monday night I was up late tinkering with the book project and just so happen to have on my super neat, FEATHERED long overcoat sweater….it has long delicate black feathers on the sleeves and neck… and well.. I kinda fell asleep with it on.. BIG MISTAKE.. because when I awoke the next morning.. I had black ink in the shape of the feathers imprinted all over my neck and wrist..OOHHHH wow.. just look at that….turning my neck right.. ooohh.. interesting…. turning my neck left.. bride of Dracula...fairly impressive.... what a cheap a-s freaking sweater…!!!.. I had to call Joe in to help scrub it off.....jeez us.. he was like WTF is that Wendy!!! ???? ... I wonder when he wakes up each morning does he just hold his breath for a second... in hopes that maybe.. just maybe... this day will be the day.. with no drama?

What happen to the snake?
Oh this am… unbeknownst to me... Joe is downstairs taking issues with a little visitor.. (aka: Mr. mouse…)…. it appears that it was hiding in the cat’s room downstairs (they have their own little room - closet space for their litter and food bowls) and while Joe was down there this little creature jumps out of nowhere and scared the living sh-t out of him.. thus mayhem ensued.. the mouse ends up sitting in the cat’s food bowl blinking at Joe.... while our cats looked at it.. Yeah you would think the cats would earn their keep but OH NO.. they were like, “Daddy there is something in our food bowl get it out..”

So Joe proceeds to spray the little bastard (the mouse not the cats) with Clorox clean up…..(like what the h-ll is that going to do??).. then chased it around the room with a broom… smashing everything but the mouse and ripping the top off my broom ….creating utter complete havoc .. finally corner it and getting it out.. … and what were the cats doing.. ??? …watching Joe run around like a lunatic..

I wonder what happen to the snake.. ?..I guess the hawk got it this year.. ?.....shame because we haven’t had any mice problems for four years... oh well I guess you cant have everything.



Sunday, December 28, 2008

What to get the Gal that has everything

Thanks Santa for my Compound Bow!

Man.. I don’t know.. ...I am thinking..... if Santa was a WISE Santa he would have X'd out...SLASHED... or eradicated that request... and perhaps.. maybe... brought me a puzzle or something....

...but Santa knows me real well.. and Santa is a FUN Santa... so he brought me TWO..... yes two compound bows for Christmas.. one was from Santa Joe and one was from Santa Parents...

S-P-O-I-L-E-D ....R-O-T-T-O-N ....So I have the “training” bow and the full fledge a-s kicking split a tree in two bow...

Did you know you have to have your arrows made to the specifications of the length of your draw?.... Yeah found that out just recently.. thanks KS....so not wanting to wait not one more second.. I grab my trainer bow with two trainer arrows and march outside to find some targets... hmm.. Joe seeing what I was about to attempt runs out and suggests perhaps maybe pulling the old pumpkin from the refuse pile and aiming at that... great idea honey... (much better than the alternative I was thinking)..

I have no intention to shoot anything live thank you very much.. I am as my mother calls me a tree hugger, animal activist who so happens to eat dear meat and wears sheep skin shoes.. sorry... call me what you want.. I like my stuff ...but I won’t actually shoot anything alive unless it’s like charging after me and going to eat me... but what I do want to do is shoot things around the yard.. practice... and maybe even do a biathlon snowshoe event ..they have them you know, instead of shooting a gun and snowshoeing you do archery... I mean fun stuff!!!... right!??

So I am zinging arrows around the yard trying to hit the pumpkin and JEEZ US.... no wonder dad said NOT to put my target near rocks because IT MAY RICOCHET....Joe look at that.. arrow almost made it back to me without me moving... ... glad I didn’t have to go to the hospital with an arrow in my head... Santa is sure shaking his head...

I hope everyone’s holiday was fun too!


Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Simple Solution

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? ....

.........I really don’t know what the fascination is with blonde jokes…. I mean brunettes and red heads have there fair of stupidiness…so why pick on blondes?


So … my outside Christmas lights stopped working the other day… I figured it HAD to be due to the sleet and freezing rain that we were blessed with over the weekend.. perhaps freezing the outside receptacle…???.... I think that’s a fairly smart assumption… so I gave it a day… my daughter Heather tinkers with it a bit too….. "Mom cant get the lights to work"…..yeah I know… I think it’s frozen… so I analyze the situation… I painstakingly and dang near froze to death in the 10 degree weather spending an excessive amount of time trying to eradicate the problem….. thoroughly inspecting all the wires… rechecking ALL the fuses… making sure all the extensions are connected… NOPE.. still nada.. still no freaking Christmas lights.!!... It must be the actual receptacle.. I scour the garage for a replacement one..… sigh…...WTF..!!!... I mean come on… .. ponder ….ponder ….ponder…..they WERE working until this past weekend.. what variable changed.. ???!!!!!...

DING ….DING.. OH YEAH.. GRRRR….. the most complex problems sometimes have the simplest solutions…

....Joe…..who unplugged them????!

Genetic Snowflake

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Pittsfield Snowshoe Marathon & Half Marathon

On March 7th.. Denise and I will be heading up to Vermont to participate in the Pittsfield Snowshoe Marathon....I somehow persuaded her to buy snowshoes and come with me... VERY NICE!
****************
For Denise… I AM SOO excited you are joining me this year!!!!!… its going to be an interesting road trip!!.... (get an ipod)……..

In case I forgot to mention last year’s adventure:…
Pittsfield Snowshoe 2008 Story

For my Better Half & E-O the Beast… you aint going to let two girlies show you up .. now are u?
Pittsfield Snowshoe Marathon Website

Friday, December 19, 2008

Thieves

Picked up the Christmas Tree on the way home last night.. the "REAL TREE".. the one that Santa puts the presents under.. ..and yeah so OK.. I KNOW I HAVE 15+ other trees decorated in the house.. BUT they ARE NOT the SANTA TREE…. !!! ....They are A-R-T-I- F-C-I-A-L …. But JEEZ US.. when did you have to take a bank loan out to buy a live Christmas tree????........

I stopped at the first Christmas Tree thievery place .... the place I usually stop… and asked the prices.. ..WELL.. the Douglas Firs are…bla..bla..bla…per foot…. and then the Blue Spruces….are like….bla… bla… bla.. and WHOA buddy… me no RELAT-O… how much is THAT TREE.. ????.....I point to a cute, not overly large tree…he brings out a GIANT RULER… hmm.. well… its.. almost 9 feet.. and soo.. hmmm….that would be $85 dollars… my EYEBALLS almost popped outta my head… R they F- kidding me.. ??????... DO they realize it’s NOT dipped in gold.. right???...

So the man asks.. what SIZE you looking for???... Um… size is not the problem.. PRICE... like (as my voice gets quieter.. and now I am at a whisper).. like around $50? …why do I hear crickets? ….my cheeks are a bit flush.. perhaps the tree for me is just not here… thanks… bye..

So a bit dejected and a BIT annoyed… I leave the thieves...WITHOUT a Christmas Tree… Bunch of money grubbing #@*^*^…

So thinking I am just not sure WHAT to do…. I come across a brightly lit area near my home… HMM.. looks like they have trees too.. oh heck why not.. so I stop… I slosh around the mud and check out the trees… they are all marked.. ok.. that’s better at least I don’t have to freaking guess what the price is.. ok so I am not a moron … the guy comes over and says $10 off any tree $60 and over.. .. I aint great at gambling.. in fact.. I usually lose so… .I picked me out a freaking tree…stuff it in the truck and with a SMILE ...and $62 lighter… feeling like I got me a deal… !!

PS: YES D.D. ....I do realize thats like 4 race entries

PSS: M.H... I do all this decorating for..?? (I get back to ya on that)

PSSS: D.P & G.P.....YES.. it's necessary that I have these many trees!!!!!!

PSSSS: J.M.. thanks honey for my tree... I LOVE IT!!!... stringing popcorn tonight!

Wing Nut

GOT the "LED..GIT".... Pics in and posted them in to the Birthday Extravaganza Story... That PICKLE MAN IS GREAT!!!!... Yes S.B.... I am a little wing nut!
Birthday Extravaganza Story

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Is it Cheating?

This is … getting ridiculous… Coach Joe says I am not permitted to do A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G.. until my two weeks are up.. and WTF..!!!.... all I said I was going to do was walk 3 miles tonight.. and I mean its walking.. I mean so..!!!.... maybe he thinks I would powerwalk… ???.....or that I couldn’t tell the difference between walking and say a light jog… ???......and he says "NO…..!!"..... I am SOOO looking for a new coach.. this s-cks….

Happpiness...

..... is finding a gumball with a smile.......

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Mount Krumpet

Mount Krumpet… or so our home is sometimes referred to… .. BUT WHY?....
(Pic is from last year's snow)
  • Perhaps because we live on a slight hill….???....
  • Perhaps it is in reference to the Grinch (aka: MY Better Half)....????.....
  • Perhaps… it’s just because Mt. Krumpet is associated with Dr. Seuss characters… which would explain a lot…CRAZY STRANGE characters ….

.....but either case.. Mount Krumpet was blessed last night….…we had about an inch and a half of snow… nothing to usually write home about…. BUT on top of the snow was a really fine coating of ice…. it was MAGNIFICENT… a crystal winter wonderland… like being in a DREAM……the icicles were making a slight tinkling sound as they slipped off the branches… and the moonlight was shimmering across the lawn caused a sparkling glaze that looked like glitter…and OH WOW……breathtaking…

.…. HONESTLY… I didn’t realize this “magical kingdom” at first ….since I was all in a HUFF… chasing my dog up the back hill at 5am (don’t ask)…. in my slippers and housecoat….!!!....… but when I did catch her and STOPPED.. …and looked around… that’s when the OH>> .. And… AHHH’s… and WOW’s happened… >>> and then I realized I was standing in the middle of the yard in the SNOW.. .. in my freaking slippers.. ……. you must visit my Mount Krumpet sometime…….

****************************************************************************
PS: OMG.. YOU HAD TO ASK….following my story above..... the reason I was out in the snow in my slippers..

…my dog….15+ years old.. old as dirt. deaf, blind, and smelly….. wanted to go outside this am.. and I was SOO TIRED.. I mean it was 5am!!! And….so.. I send her out.. . and I realize I forgot to take off her diaper.. YES she has to wear one (a doggie diaper) because she is old and well you know cant always hold herself.. …so I feel really bad I forgot to take it off…. and realizing this….because I am coming out of my sleep stupor…. I chase off after her into the darkness.. .. forgetting to put on my glasses.... so now I cant see anything far away.. …so I am out there and I don’t see her (which that shouldn’t surprise me)….. and I try and call her name… but OF COURSE she cannot hear me… . so I see she has left little paw prints in the snow… and so I follow them …around the yard.. and up the hill and I am now at a jog… in my slippers and housecoat.. crunching snow… and I FIND HER… and she looks at ME like I am the insane one… that’s when I realized it was really beautiful out there.. I SOO wanted to lay in snow but Joe would have had me committed for sure… can you imagine him waking up and looking outside to see me laying in the snow in my housecoat and slippers… !?

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

DOUGH

He just does not understand……
"How can you do that to you body?"....
"How can you eat that sh-t?"........
....how to explain my utter complete LOVE & ADORATION .....in STUFFING my face full of raw cookie dough batter… ???.....with as my mother puts it… lethal doses of “uncooked raw eggs”… ???....if I have to explain it to you .. you will never understand… poor Joe..some things in life you just have to experience....

I FINISHED my final…I am basking in my glory… you know 20+ years of stale air hasn’t killed all the cells… give me that A+ thank you very much!.... Waited around for the final grade…. aced the final with a 100% … Y-E-S…..and completed the course with a 96%... thank G_D that course is done… don’t anyone ask me about freaking oligopoly, limited liability, or what the h-ll the marketing mix is…just give me some dough ........

Monday, December 15, 2008

This is a direct quote from my cousin regarding my activities:
......" I would swear you got enough attention growing up and enough hugs. The only thing I can come up with is you had to have been dropped on your head!!!"

You can never do to much…

one week on “REST”……and I THINK I am handling it quite well .. thank you very much....!!!..... so... Joe and I attended his work’s Holiday Party Saturday night… and it got me thinking...... (which is NEVER a good thing).. see I met this really special gal there… who kinda stood out with a special zest… and in my conversations with her I come to find out we were kindred spirits.. we both were belly dancers… (Yes this is me a couple years ago ..during my troupe's Middle Eastern Dance Performances)..
....SO
...... she got me thinking... ..hmmm......can I fit this back in the schedule??...oh come on.. family… I gotta think on this.....

..GOING TO GO STUDY NOW for my college final tomorrow night ...... . whew... another class down only 2-1/2 years to go......... N-I-C-E....

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Birthday Extravaganza

Birthday Extravaganza Pre-week
.....like a good girl .. I got my physical... yeah...doc says I am in perfect health.. that whatever I am doing ...to keep doing (....he has no idea.. does he????!!)....

....flash ahead three days later ....I end up with the “Rhino” virus... aka "Common Cold"... WTF!...... I have NOT been sick for over two years....and I picked up something as simple as a common cold at the doctor's office.... ....GRRR...ARGH...

.... So each day I get worse.. crawling to work...crawling home... convinced I am on death’s door...whining... and then some... but somehow still managed to whip up a jfffy cool costume for Saturday's Reindeer Race......I was determined.. N-O-T-H-I-N-G...was going to spoil my birthday weekend!!!.... now...not only was this MY birthday weekend...... we also would be celebrating Joe’s birthday... his birthday is 3 days before mine.. ..

Part 1 - Saturday, December 6th
.....rise and shine birt
hday weekend time!!!.....@ 6am I head to the Reindeer 5K...in costume....Joe um... Joe????.....still asleep....sometimes life is just too fun.. I am thinkin, “boy, I better win this costume contest and if that santa thinks he is in... I am going to take him outside and beat the snot out of him...” (I have the originals of the pics on order)

... it was really cold .. in the 20’s.. but I wasn’t necessarily too cold...guess not.. I was wearing long underwear..... HOLY SH_T!!...... I am going to incinerate..... I am sick.. sick.. sick... and overly dressed
.......OFF we go...


......as I look over ..I am running with a pickle.....so what do you say to a pickle>???...... “You know.. {pause} ...I have never run with a pickle before..... but...I have run with an ear of corn..”...

....Did I win the costume contest??? ......YOU BET!...... Joe asked how I could best a pickle....WHAT CAN I SAY?.... what a great start of the weekend! .. ...


Part 2
...heading to indoor rock climbing & go-carting.....YES!!!!......oops.. I failed to actually call the place to see if it was open....sure the normal person would assume that when the internet says OPEN Saturdays from 12-8... that they would truly be open from 12-8... and so the really retarded question was when I asked the guy when I got there, UM your internet says you are open”... and he proceeds to tell me it's closed for a tournament... ummm.. like it wasn't listed on your website (thinking maybe I REALLY AM THAT BLONDE).... he hands me a 20% off next visit coupon.. sorry... bye.

Man.. sucks.. ..pouty face.... what to do... ?.... go indoor go-carting....and lazer tagging... but of course not before Joe says to me.. GEE did you see if they are still open too????... grrr.....We end up at Arnolds Amusement place in King of Prussia.. Joe makes some sort of statement that this was where he went for my brother's bachelor party... but doesn’t remember it.. hmm.. GEE ...

...I am trying to figure out how my daughter Heather got so competitive?.....

somehow that 8 minutes on the track with her and I duking it out for the lead... and what was that Joe.. ??... HUH???

......you said you had a S-L-O-W car.. yeah ok..... so what happen at Laser tag?.... S-L-O-W gun?.... we all had a blast... what a great way to spend the day.... by the time we got to my birthday dinner at my parents I could barely keep my eyes open on....

Sunday, December 7th – THE BIG DAY
..... My Birthday... I awoke to snow..... yes..... now that is a great gift!!! .. It’s the one thing each year I secretly wish for ..... a few flakes for my birthday.. first on the agenda was to meet Denise at the indoor track meet, then head over to West Chester University to run a double header - Brians Run 5K & 10K.... then meet the QVC Running Club crew in WC for our end of the year celebration...

Part 1
....Denise is a good friend... she elected to accompany me on all the crazy stuff I was doing this weekend.. including dragging herself to an indoor track meet ...even though she had only run one indoor track event in her life, some 20 years ago....and that didn’t go well..so we elected to run the 1 Mile event only....

....I should have known... you know.. a year old.. wiser... that since I couldn’t breath out of my nose (being sick and all)... that this would not go well... 8 laps... that's the indoor mile... by lap 3 my tongue felt like it was 100 times it's natural size and furry... WHHA THHE.........by lap 4.... I lost all ability to swallow....AHHH......it was as though I ate sand.... I was sooo DRY...water.. I need water.....

(TONGUE OF A CHAMPION)

...[further reading on this later states that I was probably dehydrated...makes sense being all sick for so many days with the night sweats and such... and by breathing only with my mouth (since I couldn’t breath with my nose).. I dried my mouth and mucuses out... especially since indoor tracks are soo dry>> oh really..... yeah think????]

.... I am most certain I ran lap 5 and 6 with my mouth open and tongue hanging out.. VERY ATTRACTIVE... I am sure... ...sweet... I ran my WORSE mile time ever on a flat indoor course...with Denise beating me.... VERY NICE.....I will just hang myself now... .

Part 2
....So weather.com was calling for mid 20’s to low 30’s temps and high winds of 20 mph with occasional 30+ gusts...K... day is getting better... AS you notice Joe has decided that he was NOT... did I say N-O-T... partaking in these run events and would just later meet us at WC for the end of the year get together... S-M-A-R-T man...


....I want to say the day got better.. I want to say how much fun it was trying to breath as I slowly turned the rest of my body into mush...but I will just go with... I am not sure HOW I finished those races feeling the way I did....but I did finish.. and YEAH I did have fun.. except for the 10K where Denise thought she would be nice and run with me.. and then proceeded to chat... like HELLO.. ???!!!.....CAN NOT F_ BREATHE.. !!!.....how am I suppose to Chat and RUN and BREATHE@????

...she proceeded to go on ....and on about how she glued her two fingers together the night before doing some sort of craft project and then how she had to have her son research on the internet how to get them unstuck.. and olive oil works wonders... and did she notice I was grimacing at her?? ....Finally I ditched her..

..WHEW.. I had to walk up the last large hill.. I KNEW she couldn’t hang with that.. but I really couldn't breathe at all at this point... But honestly.. she is a good friend.. just a little too much PEP there... LATER......I come to find out that she made me a birthday tiara... that’s the craft project that she glued her fingers together doing.. AWE....she is soo super sweet.. shame she didn’t glue her lips shut.. oops .. I mean her feet to the ground.. oops.. I have to work on those out loud thoughts...

Denise ended up beating me in all the races we did together this weekend.. it's because I was sick you know...

PS: I am on R-E-S-T now


PSS: I AM POSTING THE ORIG PICTURES AS SOON AS I GET THEM...

The Hammer

YOU KNOW ….…just when you think I have exhausted all my eyebrow raising resources in finding new and unique things to do…I find one friend who does something that.. well .. dang it…. is just too cool......have you ever heard of HUFFY BIKE THROWING?? …. No …. NOT HUFFING@!!!!!... Like Huffy Mountain Bike Tossing.. ..???.... yeah like picking up a bike and seeing how far you can throw it… ??!!!........NOW how cool is that….!!!!...

...Of course I wouldn’t do that with my beloved Ghoul MTB bike… but I most certainly may do that with my Triathlon bike if it gets another flat tire this year…. And I think I may practice this… and yeah… sounds like something I need to do.. if I can just get these pidgin arms to lift the bike..

Check out the Huffy Toss Champion Story from Eric’s Blog: (note Eric is a friend of Joe’s and mine from way back.. he just completed his first Ironman Triathlon and was an Olympic caliber thrower in college/high school… he is suppose to teach me how to throw the Hammer this year… shhhh… hmmm) Huffy Tossing

P.S. I should have my story of this weekend posted tonight or tomorrow!!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

REST

Birthday Extravaganza weekend ......
******I will post our story in the next few days..…
………REST………..I am officially on Rest for two weeks.. .. no work outs.. no running, no biking, no swimming, no um snowshoeing… then approx a month no races… I AM MOST CERTAIN that I better come back freaking bionic or there will be H-ll to pay!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

More Pics Rehoboth Marathon

This is picture of Joe and I at the Rehoboth Marathon on November 22nd... I told you we looked like Ninjas! ...I added this pic and a few others to that race report....click here: Rehoboth Marathon Story

Monday, December 1, 2008

Dirty Bird

So what do you do when you have to get rid of 72 race t-shirts…?????..... hmmm… donate them to a local charity and then go run another race!!.......... I had to clean out my closet this weekend ........
so I carefully made two piles.. keepers and get ridders… the ones that made the keeper pile were usually ones that were unique, meaningful, or downright comfy… well yesterday’s race t-shirt was a KEEPER…


Technically I am not on “REST” yet as that is suppose to happen AFTER my birthday weekend.. next weekend.. so the Dirty Bird 15K (9.3 miles) Trail Run just so happen to be yesterday and well… I signed Joe and I up!!!...... My friends Denise, Tom, and Barb were also doing it… and why not… ???.....it was on trails….and trails are suppose to be “easier” on the legs… right!!???

Well the fact that it was 32 degrees and freezing rain that am… .. and then a VERY COLD steady rain during the race…… and that we all couldn’t feel our fingers, toes, or other body parts for quite some time….. I think it was well worth it! …… I mean where else can you run around like a deer in the woods…. jumping logs…[ pushing people] … galloping up hills…fighting briars… crying because you are the OLDEST out of all your friends and hubby…. and they all kicked you’re a-s… …

Me and trail running.. it’s a love / hate relationship… they say trail running is better for the legs… and better for you… hmmm.. well let’s see… in previous trail runs.. I have face planted causing a swollen, blooded lip…. slipped on ice smashing my tail bone … twisted my ankle…gotten cut, bruised, muddied, and ended up smelling like horse sh-t….. but yeah Trail Running is great.. … you can’t pay enough to have this much fun…

…The Dirty Bird was right up our alley… it was in the same park that Joe and I train in… so we were used to the hefty hills.. and I took out the first 5 miles with vigor and gusto… leaping through the woods passing slower folks… until all energies just zapped themselves up from my body.. I so need to be restrained… training on hills is the key… Barb and Tom had passed me by mile 2… careful pacing is the key…Joe zipped by me at mile 5… burning your fuel effectively is also the key… Denise passed me around mile 7… so I dragged my worn out….tired… freaking hungry a-s in that last mile……give me some FOOD!!!!!!....

......72 race t-shirts… so if I am getting rid of 72 race shirts and have kept approx 50 shirts.. within the last two years that would mean???..

Can't wait until my birthday weekend… !

Race Results

Selected - Chicago Marathon 2021

Exciting.... after trying for a number of years to get into the Chicago Marathon... I was finally selected!!! So now to figure out the best ...